I sometimes complain that I feel that my religious life is motivated by the outward signs of what I think a “Good Christian” does. They pray (alot), they read their Bibles, they read scary books with nature scene covers that use lots of multisyllabic words and talk knowledgeably about Grace as opposed to Faith and so on. I will raise my hand and admit that I totally try to do that and it is not the right way to go about things.

I would say the answer lies in being challenged. Sitting down and wrestling with issues, deciding for yourself that you believe one thing and not another. Or worse, realizing you say one thing in your head and then finding it too hard to do. I particularly hate that little moment when you know that something that I believe strongly in is not reflecting in my life and having that “okay, now what” sit down talk with myself.

The easiest way I can think of it is comparing it to studying. I learn nothing from sitting in class with my laptop out and the wifi on (even if it looks like awesome notes are being taken), its when someone asks me a question that requires rummaging through lecture notes and thinking long and hard that the little magical “Gosh you should learn this!” switch is flicked.

These thoughts seem more likely to crop up around that magical start of January, but I must admit “make things harder” is much less attractive a resolution than “continue my good-looking-ness streak.”